a prince and a sheriff. a speech artist, a spitting image of the politician of the 1960's without mccarthy. the brightest colored light on the string of lights, the brightest of the same color on another string.

the possibility of history either repeating or reshaping itself. i still feel cheated from years ago, i feel like my civic duty was to lie to myself, lie to everyone, and believe i was making a difference when i saw nothing change. i saw a quitter and a puppet go at it for months. i saw a puppet win. i still see no change in years to come. i still see the fat getting fatter, the old being prolonged on their drugs and stroke and heart attack induced living. the things i wanted to change are still here. some circles are never going to end. some circles become spirals. the squares instill more squares and we walk in single file lines, never cutting the corners. the same death march.

circles are my life now. the shape somehow always overlaps with one part and brings me to another circle to walk. walking new tracks. i find the shape at the same time filled with off ends and malformations. detours. i enjoy. recent experience has brought me in a full cirlce i opened up 5 years ago and closed. now more circles have opened up, but it doesnt change how i feel about anything, doesnt change anything i see. being a rogue and accepting it and finding out what i have to do for now. i guess time is up and i have to blend in for a bit, but i can still be part of the problem while still being one of them. no, this doesnt make me special. im doing what everyone else does. i get that. dont tell me twice. i am still a child of middle history. no purpose or place. no great war. no depression.

while the rest of the world can dance and progress and never find the same 3 shapes we all find and fall in, we sit in our squares. we walk the same blocks. see the same buildings. eat the same food. smell the same streets of piss and vinegar. and here i am, a circle inside of a square. very few circles to be found. i just see straight lines and squares. birth. plague. expire. repeat. circles can grow in size, growing out. squares become longer, become rectangles. become extended. overextended.

do i overextend a red square? do i place a blue square into the construction now? history repeats? history reshapes? who is ready to suffer their consequences and live up to their actions for once? i cant vote on religion. i cant vote on party. i cant vote on collar. i cant vote on money. i cant vote on anything. i will be cheated. i will lie to myself and everyone again. i vowed to never do that anymore, its a way of coping like those dead people do. telling themselves things they want to hear to feel better when its a school glue fix.

the roads get darker. the air is wetter. the air is heavier. the smell of rotting steel, rubber, and sulfur is thicker and nastier. the clouds are never going to leave. its going to be a long cold winter again no matter what color wins. its stil the same shape for years to come. bundle up.