i drove down memory lane and the first thoughts i had were that it still smelled the same. i drove past that old house i used to pick up a stranger (to me now) from and how we would act with no gaps between us. ALF visited as well, he walked down memory lane with me too. it made me think of how i first met the stranger, then meeting her closest, then the next thing i could remember were the hours i spent on her just talking. even apart and on our own, still hours spent. she reminded me what its like to have contact with another person. she told me without saying it "you can feel things too. you are capable of affection". i love and miss it. things changed. i changed. she changed. it was ok. it is still ok. i still remember her numbers. im just a scared boy when it comes to actually doing something to get in contact with her. i can still remember her scent like it was yesterday. i can still remember her venom like it was yesterday.

i learned to love. i learned alot from her. i dont think i have anything else to learn. i just owe her a thank you. soon. i know she wont read this, but soon. when i am done feeling afraid of you. you can tell me when its ok.